Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Huh?

Moneybombed

You may recall Alex Jones' moneybomb days last year. Throughout the first one, he interrupted callers with weird off-topic comments, cracked gay jokes, and ranted about his spiritual twin Glenn Beck (calling him, among other things, an "effeminate gremlin", "maggot-infested rotten cheese", and an "AntiChrist little bastard").

Yet his moneybomb goal was reached, since his fans actually want to see their cash converted into mediocre YouTube documentaries. He also claimed several people were threatening to sue him, so he needed the money, in part, for a legal defense fund. Or maybe for a legal attack fund that he forgot to mention.

Some of the money raised undoubtedly went toward film-making costs, but where is the rest going? Well, $15,000 it is destined to become cash prizes for "the best naked protest" against body scanning. That's just fine. I'm sure that in this brutal economic crunch time, Americans are happy to sacrifice their hard-earned nickels and dimes so that twentysomethings can be rewarded for running around nekkid in front of their friends' videophones. This will surely put a big dent in the New World Order's plot to see us all nude, then kill 80-99% of us.


Everybody Owns Hollywood

On his January 7th broadcast, Jones declared that he has "woken up" numerous A-list actors, and that most celebrities know Hollywood is fully controlled by the State Department and the CIA.

Wait, what? I thought "Hollywood is owned by the Arabs"? I'm so confused. Not only does Jones contradict himself, another *highly credible* source says CGI is a Zionist tool used for sorcery and brainwashing! "Ancient Egyptian rabbis" (whatever the hell they are) passed "kabbalistic witchcraft" on to the Knights Templar, and it ended up in the Harry Potter movies! Well, if you believe anything you see on Iranian TV, I mean.



7 comments:

Highland Host said...

Ah, you know a true cracked conspiracy theorist when the Knights Templar turn up! It's one of my indicators of truly crazed conspiracy theories, they have to work the Knights Templar in!

Now, if you can get the Titanic, the Knights Templar, Jack the Ripper and the World Council of Churches all in the SAME conspiracy theory, you win a prize!

(Note: This has actually been done. Seriously, not as satire)

SME said...

I can't quite make the connection, but am I right in guessing it all has something to do with Jesuits?

Edward said...

@SME

Have you been mentioned on The Alex Jones Show yet? If not, I totally beat you ;-)!

BTW I added you to my links on the site, I love your site a lot.

Highland Host said...

Of course it involves the Jesuits as well! The Master Conspiracy Theory HAS to involve the Jesuits. Oh, and the pyramids! You've got to get the pyramids in too! Not to mention Cecil Rhodes and the New World Order.

Actually it's all the result of fundamentalist author Gail Riplinger's overly fertile imagination, documented in her recent book "Hazardous Materials." She's associated with Texe Marrs. Which makes perfect sense. Reading the said book last year caused a great deal of laughter on my part.

Anonymous said...

SME, why dont you call the alex jones show sometime?

the_last_name_left said...

Yet his moneybomb goal was reached, since his fans actually want to see their cash converted into mediocre YouTube documentaries.

haha - what better way to spend a dime?

He also claimed several people were threatening to sue him, so he needed the money, in part, for a legal defense fund.

Ah, yeah - of course. Gotta fight off the joooos....errr I mean "globalists".

most celebrities know Hollywood is fully controlled by the State Department and the CIA.

yeah - and most celebrities are really earnest socialists and have a real interest in social justice..... Sure........who would ever think Hollywood was full of superficial wannabe's?

I find it highly amusing that Alex Jones and his cult followers find Hollywood of such importance. Hey - it's always been at the cutting edge of social reform, right?

And interesting the importance Hollywood gets considering it is at the same time considered (by the same people) as being responsible for the pornification and trivialisation of American civil life.

(Jews run hollywood, apparently, remember? Now it's a hotbed of social resistance, as well as being the source of limitless NWO propaganda? haha.)

Like ANYONE cares what Charlie Sheen says? Or any of them? Apparently Troofers care. HAHA.

S.M. Elliott said...

Didn't Charlie Sheen write the Bible? Maybe I'm thinking of some other guy.

Adding Hazardous Materials to my "special" reading list. *twirling finger in air near right ear*

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