I'm no fan of Steve Jobs myself (the Apple Store gives me hives), but this is just absurd. The state of Jobs's soul should not be keeping you awake at night. Dude has cancer. Let him die or recover in peace, and stop being a ghoul about it. Also put on some clothes.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Watson, you are so busted. Again.
However, "Jussumguy" has alerted me to a Norwegian news report about the opera house exercise conducted by Oslo police, and it didn't take place exactly two days before the bombing. It was more like two days, four months, and a year. The story is dated March 17, 2010.
Now, to be fair, this could have been an accident. Watson posted a link to a translation of the Norwegian article, and the translation does not bear the original publication date. But if you were about to broadcast an already tenuous theory to the world, wouldn't you, I dunno, look at the original article?
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Robot Ebola Copters & Super Congress Gun Raids
You know, the usual.
Media Matters has posted a detailed report on some of Jones's most recent hysterical rants, apparently not realizing that this is like reporting "Earth rotated on its axis today." Two points in the report stand out: Jones's claim that the FBI and ATF are conducting illegal searches of homes belonging to Texans who purchase more than one firearm, and his weird screed about "robot helicopters spraying airborne Ebola" to kill us all.
The gun-search claim was mentioned on the Aug. 1/11 broadcast. The information comes from "two Texas gun dealers" and "someone in my office". Unimpeachable sources, I'm sure, but we're gonna need a bit more than that before we start freaking out. The NRA hasn't reported any such searches in its news feed. It's true, though, that a new regulation requires firearms dealers in U.S.-Mexico border states to notify the ATF if someone buys more than one semiautomatic rifle in a five-day period, a regulation that already applies to handgun sales throughout the U.S. Yesterday, the NRA filed a lawsuit against the federal government over this.
The robot-copter rant came the following day, in response to a caller who despairs for the future (how could you not be miserable, if you believe everything you hear from Alex Jones?). The story must be at least three years old, because he cites his source as the Sunshine Project, which shut down in 2008. SP kept tabs on the latest biochem and nonlethal weapons technology. The website's last update was posted in October 2007.
Freaking out over old news is Jones's stock in trade. After the Rocky Mountain News folded, he was still citing an article about a biohazard incinerator in Colorado, insisting the thing was really a crematorium for the remains of Americans who would soon be slaughtered en masse. Sound familiar? Yeah, that's because we hear this shit every other day. The New World Order is out to kill 99% of us. They just haven't gotten around to it yet.
Jones is possibly referring to this document, the outline for a presentation given to the Airline Pilots Association by the DoD's Joint Non-Lethal Weapons Program in 2001. It's pretty bizarre. The JNLW proposes using commercial aircraft to spray immobilizing agents or other chemicals onto battlefields, unruly mobs, or what-have-you. There's even a proposal for using nonlethals to knock out plane passengers, presumably in a hijacking situation. But there's nothing in this presentation about drone copters, so let's move on.
Back in June, Jones reported that surveillance drones have already been in use within the U.S. for years. If you combine the notions of planes spraying nonlethal chemicals onto crowds and drone aircraft monitoring crowds, you could surmise that drone aircraft will soon be dumping chemicals. But "airborne Ebola"? First of all, there's no such thing. This is clearly a reference to the infamous comments made by University of Texas-Austin professor Eric Pianka back in 2006, one of Jones's favourite bits of "evidence" that They are plotting to wipe out all but 1% of the world's population. I've discussed this before. The bottom line is that Pianka is a herpetologist, not a biochemist, and he was referring to a naturally occurring (not to mention fictional) strain of Ebola.
Ebola is easily transmitted, has a high kill rate (50-89%), and can't be cured. So if They did get their hands on an airborne strain, it's unlikely They would be reckless enough to spray this particular virus on their own turf. After releasing it into the open air, They would have to cower in underground bunkers for months, if not years.
So once again, we have Alex Jones grabbing some disparate facts and factoids and smushing them into one big ball of irrational panic. Not exactly headline news.
Media Matters has posted a detailed report on some of Jones's most recent hysterical rants, apparently not realizing that this is like reporting "Earth rotated on its axis today." Two points in the report stand out: Jones's claim that the FBI and ATF are conducting illegal searches of homes belonging to Texans who purchase more than one firearm, and his weird screed about "robot helicopters spraying airborne Ebola" to kill us all.
The gun-search claim was mentioned on the Aug. 1/11 broadcast. The information comes from "two Texas gun dealers" and "someone in my office". Unimpeachable sources, I'm sure, but we're gonna need a bit more than that before we start freaking out. The NRA hasn't reported any such searches in its news feed. It's true, though, that a new regulation requires firearms dealers in U.S.-Mexico border states to notify the ATF if someone buys more than one semiautomatic rifle in a five-day period, a regulation that already applies to handgun sales throughout the U.S. Yesterday, the NRA filed a lawsuit against the federal government over this.
The robot-copter rant came the following day, in response to a caller who despairs for the future (how could you not be miserable, if you believe everything you hear from Alex Jones?). The story must be at least three years old, because he cites his source as the Sunshine Project, which shut down in 2008. SP kept tabs on the latest biochem and nonlethal weapons technology. The website's last update was posted in October 2007.
Freaking out over old news is Jones's stock in trade. After the Rocky Mountain News folded, he was still citing an article about a biohazard incinerator in Colorado, insisting the thing was really a crematorium for the remains of Americans who would soon be slaughtered en masse. Sound familiar? Yeah, that's because we hear this shit every other day. The New World Order is out to kill 99% of us. They just haven't gotten around to it yet.
Jones is possibly referring to this document, the outline for a presentation given to the Airline Pilots Association by the DoD's Joint Non-Lethal Weapons Program in 2001. It's pretty bizarre. The JNLW proposes using commercial aircraft to spray immobilizing agents or other chemicals onto battlefields, unruly mobs, or what-have-you. There's even a proposal for using nonlethals to knock out plane passengers, presumably in a hijacking situation. But there's nothing in this presentation about drone copters, so let's move on.
Back in June, Jones reported that surveillance drones have already been in use within the U.S. for years. If you combine the notions of planes spraying nonlethal chemicals onto crowds and drone aircraft monitoring crowds, you could surmise that drone aircraft will soon be dumping chemicals. But "airborne Ebola"? First of all, there's no such thing. This is clearly a reference to the infamous comments made by University of Texas-Austin professor Eric Pianka back in 2006, one of Jones's favourite bits of "evidence" that They are plotting to wipe out all but 1% of the world's population. I've discussed this before. The bottom line is that Pianka is a herpetologist, not a biochemist, and he was referring to a naturally occurring (not to mention fictional) strain of Ebola.
Ebola is easily transmitted, has a high kill rate (50-89%), and can't be cured. So if They did get their hands on an airborne strain, it's unlikely They would be reckless enough to spray this particular virus on their own turf. After releasing it into the open air, They would have to cower in underground bunkers for months, if not years.
So once again, we have Alex Jones grabbing some disparate facts and factoids and smushing them into one big ball of irrational panic. Not exactly headline news.
Monday, August 1, 2011
The Blame Game: Norway Edition
It's not entirely Anders Breivik's fault that he slaughtered dozens of innocent people. We should also blame the New World Order, Muslims, liberals, Jews, people who don't like Jews, and maybe Hitler.
As Alex Jones showed us, the Powers That Be staged a false-flag terror attack in Norway expressly to give themselves an excuse to squash all patriots who oppose big government and "bankster" fraud. This isn't a Norwegian thing; it's a globalist elite thing. So we must remember that domestic terrorism is not the real threat, here.
Pat Buchanan, who has been a guest on The Alex Jones Show several times, may not agree with the first part of that statement, but he's totally on board with the end of it: The media is using the massacre to undermine right-wing populist movements throughout the world. Domestic terrorism isn't the real problem.
Muslims are. Specifically, Muslims immigrating into countries like Norway. In a column at World Net Daily He writes:
"... awful as this atrocity was, native-born and homegrown terrorism is not the macro-threat to the continent.That threat comes from a burgeoning Muslim presence in a Europe that has never known mass immigration, its failure to assimilate, its growing alienation, and its sometime sympathy for Islamic militants and terrorists."
In conclusion:
"As for a climactic conflict between a once-Christian West and an Islamic world that is growing in numbers and advancing inexorably into Europe for the third time in 14 centuries, on this one, Breivik may be right."
Meanwhile, Pamela Geller (a leading opponent of the "Ground Zero Mosque") informs us that while, yes, Breivik's behaviour was monstrous, the Liberal-sponsored youth camp he targeted was an "indoctrination camp run by Norway’s ruling Labor Party for up-and-coming children of the ruling elite".
The same sentiment was expressed by Alex Jones's ideological twin, Glenn Beck, on his radio show. As reported by The Telegraph: "There was a shooting at a political camp, which sounds a little like, you know, the Hitler youth. I mean, who does a camp for kids that's all about politics? Disturbing."
He made a point of adding that a Republican youth camp would also be disturbing. I guess his fact-checker took the
Frequent Jones guest Wayne Madsen has a different take: Because Breivik was reportedly a fan of Pamela Geller's blog, this all but proves he was part of an Israeli Mossad operation to take over... well, pretty much everything.
He writes, "Because our police forces in America, New Zealand, Norway, Britain, Sweden, Denmark, France, Canada, Australia and elsewhere are infiltrated with Mossad sayanim, katsas, and jumper katsas, we must take it upon ourselves to expose these agents, publicize their names, turn the disinfectant of sunshine on their subterranean operations, and generally, make life miserable for them."
Madsen's piece was re-posted to Infowars.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Alex Jones was supposed to be Glenn Beck
I missed this show when it was broadcast (Sept. 4/10), but when someone tweeted a link to the video titled "Beck was Developed to Counter Alex Jones" I just couldn't resist poking fun at it.
This gem is jam-packed with dodgy assertions that Glenn Beck was elevated to his then-current status specifically to bring down Alex Jones.
THE EVIDENCE:
He's Copying Me!
Jones pulls out a copy of Carroll Quigley's Tragedy and Hope and makes a big deal about Glenn Beck using a quote from it in his "factional" book The Overton Window. Why? Because Jones used to recite the very same quote on his show all the time. Coincidence?!
Well, yeah, probably. I mean, it's a famous book, and conspiranoids love quoting from it when they're out to trash the "Damnocrats" or prove some theory about the shadow government.
In The Overton Window, Beck "admits" that the U.S. government stages false flag terror attacks against itself, and that it's planning to launch a false flag nuclear strike as an excuse to declare martial law. The story includes FEMA concentration camps. Most damning of all, the character based on Beck himself is a government agent posing as a patriot.
Jones considers this book a New World Order insider's take on the Master Plan.
Okay, why would Beck so blatantly expose a real top-secret agenda and his own role in it? Dunno. According to Jones, the NWO just likes to throw stuff in our faces for shits and giggles. You know, like movie villains who spend five minutes explaining how and why they're going to kill the good guy.
"I was offered Glenn Beck's job before Glenn Beck existed!"
Really? Beck's first politically-oriented radio show was The Glenn Beck Program, which began airing on Tampa's WFLA in 2000. This was his first respectable gig, the show that launched him into the Conservasphere. Before that, he was just another morning zoo monkey making racist jokes, laughing about a competitor's wife suffering a miscarriage, and continuously getting shitcanned for his dismal ratings.
Was Jones offered the WFLA job before Beck? Jones won't say. He just says he was told by unnamed Bigwigs that he could become the next Rush Limbaugh. He can't reveal the names of any of these Bigwigs, he explains, because he agreed to keep everything confidential and will not violate his agreement. Never mind that it's been at least 11 years since this alleged offer, or that it's unethical for studio heads to make you promise never to tell a living soul they once offered you a job.
I'm going to go out on a limb and call bullshit on this one. If Jones could name even one of the dudes who turned Glenn Beck into the NWO's #1 media shill, I think he would.
Also, Jones never gets around to explaining why the NWO would try to co-opt his mad radio skillz to serve their agenda, then select a paranoid populist "shill" to debunk him, only to have the shill say 90% of the same stuff Jones does. Jones harps on the 10% of their content that differs (bailouts, 9/11, etc.) in an effort to convince us that Beck is a disinfo machine, but it just doesn't ring true. I've said before that Jones and Beck seem to have been separated at birth.
Of course, Jones said all this when Beck was at the top of his game, raking in the highest ratings Fox News has ever seen. Nowadays, he's hawking his Glenn Beck Network, an online-only "tv station" that will never, ever, have as many viewers as Fox News. Hell, a huge percentage of Fox News viewers don't even know how to use computers.
Would the New World Order really let Beck, their carefully-groomed stooge, sink so low?
If They really wanted to debunk Jones's rants about FEMA camps, false-flag terror attacks, and patriot persecution, They would not hire a self-described "rodeo clown" to talk about FEMA camps, false-flag terror attacks, and patriot persecution. They would do what I do, but on a significant scale: Point out the many, many flaws in Jones's "facts", theories, and opinions.
Face it, Mr. Jones: Glenn Beck is you in a suit.
This gem is jam-packed with dodgy assertions that Glenn Beck was elevated to his then-current status specifically to bring down Alex Jones.
THE EVIDENCE:
He's Copying Me!
Jones pulls out a copy of Carroll Quigley's Tragedy and Hope and makes a big deal about Glenn Beck using a quote from it in his "factional" book The Overton Window. Why? Because Jones used to recite the very same quote on his show all the time. Coincidence?!
Well, yeah, probably. I mean, it's a famous book, and conspiranoids love quoting from it when they're out to trash the "Damnocrats" or prove some theory about the shadow government.
In The Overton Window, Beck "admits" that the U.S. government stages false flag terror attacks against itself, and that it's planning to launch a false flag nuclear strike as an excuse to declare martial law. The story includes FEMA concentration camps. Most damning of all, the character based on Beck himself is a government agent posing as a patriot.
Jones considers this book a New World Order insider's take on the Master Plan.
Okay, why would Beck so blatantly expose a real top-secret agenda and his own role in it? Dunno. According to Jones, the NWO just likes to throw stuff in our faces for shits and giggles. You know, like movie villains who spend five minutes explaining how and why they're going to kill the good guy.
"I was offered Glenn Beck's job before Glenn Beck existed!"
Really? Beck's first politically-oriented radio show was The Glenn Beck Program, which began airing on Tampa's WFLA in 2000. This was his first respectable gig, the show that launched him into the Conservasphere. Before that, he was just another morning zoo monkey making racist jokes, laughing about a competitor's wife suffering a miscarriage, and continuously getting shitcanned for his dismal ratings.
Was Jones offered the WFLA job before Beck? Jones won't say. He just says he was told by unnamed Bigwigs that he could become the next Rush Limbaugh. He can't reveal the names of any of these Bigwigs, he explains, because he agreed to keep everything confidential and will not violate his agreement. Never mind that it's been at least 11 years since this alleged offer, or that it's unethical for studio heads to make you promise never to tell a living soul they once offered you a job.
I'm going to go out on a limb and call bullshit on this one. If Jones could name even one of the dudes who turned Glenn Beck into the NWO's #1 media shill, I think he would.
Also, Jones never gets around to explaining why the NWO would try to co-opt his mad radio skillz to serve their agenda, then select a paranoid populist "shill" to debunk him, only to have the shill say 90% of the same stuff Jones does. Jones harps on the 10% of their content that differs (bailouts, 9/11, etc.) in an effort to convince us that Beck is a disinfo machine, but it just doesn't ring true. I've said before that Jones and Beck seem to have been separated at birth.
Of course, Jones said all this when Beck was at the top of his game, raking in the highest ratings Fox News has ever seen. Nowadays, he's hawking his Glenn Beck Network, an online-only "tv station" that will never, ever, have as many viewers as Fox News. Hell, a huge percentage of Fox News viewers don't even know how to use computers.
Would the New World Order really let Beck, their carefully-groomed stooge, sink so low?
If They really wanted to debunk Jones's rants about FEMA camps, false-flag terror attacks, and patriot persecution, They would not hire a self-described "rodeo clown" to talk about FEMA camps, false-flag terror attacks, and patriot persecution. They would do what I do, but on a significant scale: Point out the many, many flaws in Jones's "facts", theories, and opinions.
Face it, Mr. Jones: Glenn Beck is you in a suit.
Alex Jones Predicted the Norway Massacre
Late on Saturday night, Jones suddenly realized that Infowars predicted the Norway attacks the day before they happened. He explains it all in these video messages.
It seems even Prison Planet/Infowars commenters are getting bored with everything being a "false flag", so Jones spends some time chewing them out for not knowing their history. False flags have happened, ergo everything that happens is probably false flag.
On Friday, Infowars started out speculating that Middle Eastern terrorists could be responsible for the Norway attacks. Within hours, Kurt Nimmo had concluded the whole thing was really a false flag NWO attack designed to crush the growing populist movement in Norway. Then Infowars decried the mainstream media's scapegoating of Middle Eastern terrorists. Pot, meet kettle.
Throughout all this nonsense, Infowars didn't say anything about Jones predicting the attacks.
Now, Jones insists he saw it coming on Thursday. "How did I know? How could I not, it was like the media was rolling out a new soft drink, it was so in your face."
So did he actually call it, just like he "predicted" 9/11 and the Austin plane crash? Not really. What Jones griped about on Thursday was the use of white terror suspects in DHS terrorism-awareness videos. These are the same hokey PSA videos I discussed back in January. In his opinion, they're a huge part of the NWO effort to brand white populists like himself as The New Threat to Mankind. In my opinion, they're generic PSAs. The reason the vids don't feature Middle Eastern men acting suspiciously is because the DHS didn't want to come off as a bunch of racist fucks.
Besides, what the hell does the DHS campaign have to do with Norway? I know Jones thinks the NWO hands down global edicts from some secret location, but it doesn't. What happens in Norway pretty much affects only Norway. It's a socialist nation with universal healthcare and gay marriage. Obviously, it is not following the exact same script as the U.S.
To be fair, though, governments are growing concerned about homegrown terrorism perpetrated by angry right-wing dudes, and they might take some unwise measures to try to prevent the Breiviks among us from going apeshit. Jones tells us that in order to do this, the governments first have to stage false flag attacks that look like right-wing atrocities.
But, wait, sometimes terrorist acts really are carried out by angry right-wing dudes. Can't the NWO baddies just wait until one of them goes apeshit, then crack down on the anti-government movements?
Well, no. You see, as Jones has explained to us many times, there are no right-wing mass murderers, only right-wing patsies. All crazy gunmen are left-wing.
space
Saturday, July 23, 2011
The Norwegian Massacre Mystery Is Solved
Thank you, Infowars!
As mentioned in the last post ("Let's All Jump to Conclusions"), Kurt Nimmo of Infowars has decided that Anders Breivik is "obviously a patsy for a Gladio operation to destroy political opposition to the bankers." The Powers That Be in Norway were fed up with populist opposition to the New World Order agenda, so they staged a false flag terrorist attack that implicates a right-wing, anti-government terrorist.
Sounds good. But just for fun, let's be contrarian and examine this theory a little.
Evidence for a false-flag attack:
1. Breivik belonged to Norway's Progressive Party, a populist libertarian party that opposes big government and economic bailouts.
As Nimmo himself states, however, Breivik hasn't been a member of the Progressive Party for four years. Wouldn't it make more sense to frame, I dunno, a current member? If you pick a patsy whose membership has lapsed for nearly half a decade, the sensible members of the public will just assume that Breivik no longer subscribes to the PP platform, and conclude that his involvement isn't germane to what happened Friday.
Breivik's major beef, if the video and manifesto attributed to him are authentic, was Muslim immigrants. If you wanted an anti-government/anti-big business patsy, would you pick this guy? No. You'd pick a guy who makes incoherent vids about the evils of banksterism.
Protip: If you're trying to destroy the reputation of a large political movement by making its members look like psychotic mass murderers, you might want to frame more than one guy, and make sure they actually belong to said political movement.
2. Lots of false flag attacks have been staged.
Well, yes. And lots of people have gone on shooting rampages for any number of dipshit reasons.
3. The Norway massacre has been likened to the Oklahoma City bombing, and that was a false flag attack designed to squash the Patriot movement.
Really? Then why did every other douchebag in Washington try to pin it on Middle Eastern terrorists? Did they not get the memo?
4. Breivik may have been a Freemason. Another gunman who targeted children, Thomas Hamilton of Scotland, was a Freemason - and perhaps part of a Freemasonic conspiracy.
The Dunblane conspiracy theories are, to be blunt and crude, fucking retarded. And no, I don't mean retarded in a developmentally disabled way. I mean retarded in the I-have-a-fully-functional-mind-but-I'd-rather-waste-it-thinking-up-idiotic-conspiracy-fairytales way. The Dunblane theory is basically this: The Scottish Powers That Be wanted to outlaw guns, but They knew The People would fight them tooth and nail. So they blackmailed or persuaded a mentally unstable pedophile Freemason to go into a school and shoot as many little children as possible. Voila! Problem solved! No more guns, and only 16 innocent Scottish children had to die.
To buy this theory, you have to ignore the fact that the Tory government didn't outlaw handguns, but restricted legal handguns to single-shot .22s. This was on the recommendation of the Home Affairs Select Committee, which advised that outlawing all handguns would be worthless "panic legislation". It was the Liberal [correction: Labour] government that put a ban on all handguns. If the sinister master plan was to get rid of guns, then the Tories would have done it ASAP. They're good at sinister master plans.
The shooter, Thomas Hamilton, was very peeved that people kept getting in the way of his youth group leadership (he was turfed from the Scouts back in the '70s for inappropriate behaviour, but had set up several "youth clubs" since that time). He was continuously getting complaints from parents, and felt that his favourite activity was about to be taken away from him. He was also unemployed and completely freaking insane.
Theoretically, yes, Masons could blackmail other Masons to do all kinds of wacky stuff. But I don't suppose that's any more common than plain old blackmail.
5. The blasts may have come from beneath the buildings, rather than from a car bomb. Whew! Finally, some meaty physical evidence!
Or maybe not. According to this article by Paul Joseph Watson, the source is the father of an anonymous Norwegian emailer. According to Anon's dad, an explosives expert, the "pattern of damage and debris" reveal the blast came from underground. Until this alleged guy gives us some details, or someone else notices the same thing, I'd say this piece of evidence is thinner than lefse.
And to get all semantic and shit, let's remember that the term "patsy" was originally used to denote scapegoats; innocent or marginally involved people blamed for someone else's actions. Nowadays the word is used promiscuously, slapped on everyone from co-conspirators to masterminds who get busted for their minions' doings. This is bullshit. Real patsies are not involved in the plot, don't know there even is a plot, and probably won't admit to doing anything wrong unless there's some heavy-duty coercive questioning going on.
As Breivik has already reportedly confessed to this crime without implicating even one accomplice, he's likelier to be the guy who did this than a fall guy.
As mentioned in the last post ("Let's All Jump to Conclusions"), Kurt Nimmo of Infowars has decided that Anders Breivik is "obviously a patsy for a Gladio operation to destroy political opposition to the bankers." The Powers That Be in Norway were fed up with populist opposition to the New World Order agenda, so they staged a false flag terrorist attack that implicates a right-wing, anti-government terrorist.
Sounds good. But just for fun, let's be contrarian and examine this theory a little.
Evidence for a false-flag attack:
1. Breivik belonged to Norway's Progressive Party, a populist libertarian party that opposes big government and economic bailouts.
As Nimmo himself states, however, Breivik hasn't been a member of the Progressive Party for four years. Wouldn't it make more sense to frame, I dunno, a current member? If you pick a patsy whose membership has lapsed for nearly half a decade, the sensible members of the public will just assume that Breivik no longer subscribes to the PP platform, and conclude that his involvement isn't germane to what happened Friday.
Breivik's major beef, if the video and manifesto attributed to him are authentic, was Muslim immigrants. If you wanted an anti-government/anti-big business patsy, would you pick this guy? No. You'd pick a guy who makes incoherent vids about the evils of banksterism.
Protip: If you're trying to destroy the reputation of a large political movement by making its members look like psychotic mass murderers, you might want to frame more than one guy, and make sure they actually belong to said political movement.
2. Lots of false flag attacks have been staged.
Well, yes. And lots of people have gone on shooting rampages for any number of dipshit reasons.
3. The Norway massacre has been likened to the Oklahoma City bombing, and that was a false flag attack designed to squash the Patriot movement.
Really? Then why did every other douchebag in Washington try to pin it on Middle Eastern terrorists? Did they not get the memo?
4. Breivik may have been a Freemason. Another gunman who targeted children, Thomas Hamilton of Scotland, was a Freemason - and perhaps part of a Freemasonic conspiracy.
The Dunblane conspiracy theories are, to be blunt and crude, fucking retarded. And no, I don't mean retarded in a developmentally disabled way. I mean retarded in the I-have-a-fully-functional-mind-but-I'd-rather-waste-it-thinking-up-idiotic-conspiracy-fairytales way. The Dunblane theory is basically this: The Scottish Powers That Be wanted to outlaw guns, but They knew The People would fight them tooth and nail. So they blackmailed or persuaded a mentally unstable pedophile Freemason to go into a school and shoot as many little children as possible. Voila! Problem solved! No more guns, and only 16 innocent Scottish children had to die.
To buy this theory, you have to ignore the fact that the Tory government didn't outlaw handguns, but restricted legal handguns to single-shot .22s. This was on the recommendation of the Home Affairs Select Committee, which advised that outlawing all handguns would be worthless "panic legislation". It was the Liberal [correction: Labour] government that put a ban on all handguns. If the sinister master plan was to get rid of guns, then the Tories would have done it ASAP. They're good at sinister master plans.
The shooter, Thomas Hamilton, was very peeved that people kept getting in the way of his youth group leadership (he was turfed from the Scouts back in the '70s for inappropriate behaviour, but had set up several "youth clubs" since that time). He was continuously getting complaints from parents, and felt that his favourite activity was about to be taken away from him. He was also unemployed and completely freaking insane.
Theoretically, yes, Masons could blackmail other Masons to do all kinds of wacky stuff. But I don't suppose that's any more common than plain old blackmail.
5. The blasts may have come from beneath the buildings, rather than from a car bomb. Whew! Finally, some meaty physical evidence!
Or maybe not. According to this article by Paul Joseph Watson, the source is the father of an anonymous Norwegian emailer. According to Anon's dad, an explosives expert, the "pattern of damage and debris" reveal the blast came from underground. Until this alleged guy gives us some details, or someone else notices the same thing, I'd say this piece of evidence is thinner than lefse.
And to get all semantic and shit, let's remember that the term "patsy" was originally used to denote scapegoats; innocent or marginally involved people blamed for someone else's actions. Nowadays the word is used promiscuously, slapped on everyone from co-conspirators to masterminds who get busted for their minions' doings. This is bullshit. Real patsies are not involved in the plot, don't know there even is a plot, and probably won't admit to doing anything wrong unless there's some heavy-duty coercive questioning going on.
As Breivik has already reportedly confessed to this crime without implicating even one accomplice, he's likelier to be the guy who did this than a fall guy.
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